crocoWife is a member of our town's "Mothers Club."  It's an organization that creates a pseudo-social circle of mothers who are nice to each other's faces and talk behind each other's backs.  You know, like any group of women, really.  Anyway ... the moms with same-aged children meet weekly for the kids to play together and the moms to have panty pillow fights.  Typically they meet at the playground, or the pumpkin patch, or Victoria's Secret dressing rooms, places like that.  The responsibility of the meeting place rotates amongst the moms, so one mom picks/organizes a place each week.  Today's mom chose to meet at a park they had not visited before.  The reason she chose this new park?  Because there were recent sightings of mountain lions.

Yeah, that sounds like fun for my daughter.  I'm sure she won't miss me after the lion drags her into the brush.  She'll be like Tarzan, raised by mountain lions.  Now, I've been frustrated with my kid, but I've never felt the urge to feed her to a large cat.  No no, I'm just kidding.  Actually it's a great choice of location because, you know, mountain lions are known to be very friendly to small children. By the way, parking costs $4 at this park (AKA a $4 service fee to have your child eaten by a cougar).

If you are a mom in a mom's club, let me tell you how your husband feels about it.  He hates it.  He hates being forced to meet your new "friends."  He hates attending the parties and gatherings now required because YOU joined a club.  He hates getting turned into trade bait, for example "you babysit my kid and my husband will help your husband build a second story for your house!"  Whaaaa ...!?!  Let me get this straight ... because YOU joined a club, now I have to walk in Jesus's footsteps and be a fucking master carpenter?  What's next, carrying the cross and martyrdom?!  (Ahem.  I'm talking about OTHER husbands, of course.  Not me.)

Here's another thing the mom's club sponsors, "mom's night out."  Translation: dad's night to babysit.  As if the dads are just sitting on their asses all day and night while mom works her broken fingers to the bone, and so now mom needs a night out.  Could you imagine if there was a dad's club and "dad's night out?"  Women's libbers across the country would load their shotguns for mountain lion over that shit.

The one good thing about the moms club comes to those who are interested in MILFs.  If you're looking for a MILF, just infiltrate your local mothers club and you'll be able to pick and choose.  Find out when and where "mom's night out" is and you have a good chance of finding a hot little mom who is tipsy and maybe not so happy in her marriage.  You can do the math from there.